Dear December

Dear December,

Last time this year, I endured one of the most difficult times of my life. But what a difference a year makes. One year later, and my life has come full circle. Last Christmas, I was forced to make the best of a really (for lack of a better word) $hitty situation. For the first time in my entire life, I was not only away from my family, but on Christmas morning, I was entirely alone. And let me tell you - you can do a lot of soul searching in a time like that. A 5-year relationship had just recently come to an end, I was 4,000+ miles away from home and my family, and what was always meant to be one of the happiest days of the year, was a sad, empty, lonely - very lonely - depressing day. I remember on Christmas night, I sat in the dark by the light of my tree trying desperately not to feel sorry for myself. I didn't cry (although I did stuff my face full of bacon wrapped shrimp and guzzled down some rum-spiked eggnog). I just knew that next year would be different. It HAD to be. And indeed - it is.

This will be the second time in my entire life that I'll be spending Christmas away from home and my family. But I am not sad, nor am I lonely, nor am I without family. In fact, I am FAR from it. In the past year, I have created an extended family (or "ohana" as they say in Hawaii). The friendships and relationships I've cultivated over the past year are extraordinary. And by far, the most poignant and meaningful relationship I've developed (aside from the one with myself) is with Travis. Over the past year+ he has been an amazing source of comfort, support, love, and friendship. He is simply an amazing human being. And this past October, after a very long year of a long distance relationship, (with only a few trips here and there for visits),  he picked up his life in Miami and moved in with me here in Honolulu. So this year, I'm dedicating my Christmas to him. Because in this season - one that's devoted to family, togetherness, love, gratitude, generosity, selflessness, hope and joy - Travis has been the embodiment of all these things for me in the past year. So even though I am far away from my immediate family (Mom & Dad, my brother, aunts and uncles, etc) I know my family is not limited to the people I'm missing in Florida. I have love and family right here on this island. Right here in this room.

What better Christmas present is there?

And I just want to end this Christmas blog by saying this: take a real good hard look in the mirror when you start to complain about the insignificant little inconveniences that sometimes make their way into our lives. In the wake of the Hurricane Sandy and Newtown, Connecticut tragedies, try your best to have a little perspective. Know that in the vast and violent nature of the universe, the fact that you exist is nothing short of a miracle. Take hold of that miracle - grasp it tightly - and may you never waste a single moment of it in regret or hopelessness. Let go of yesterday, live for today, and simply hope for tomorrow that you may try again. All we have is now... and that "now," in the grand scheme of things, is just a microscopic blip that will vanish in the blink of an eye if you're not present, awake, and aware in every moment of your life. Open your eyes. See. Hear. Smell. Taste. FEEL. If you can't find anything more to be grateful for than the simple fact that you have access to the 5 senses that make it possible to process the sheer beauty of the world around you... then focus on THAT, and find beauty wherever you can - because I promise you... it's everywhere.

With love and gratitude,
Chelsey

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